My favorite poems:)

Agha Shahid Ali (A Kashmiri Poet who wrote beautiful Ghazals in English, the following poem is copied from the collection Call me Ishmael Tonight. Its full of poignant and beautiful verse like the one copied here)

So I'll regret it. But lead my heart to pain.
Return, if it is just to leave me again.

"Till death do us part." Come for their sense of us...
For Belief's sake, let appearances remain.

Let YOU, at Elysian Fields, step off the streetcar-
So my sense of wonder's made utterly plain.

Not for mine but for the world's sake come back.
They ask why you left? To whom all must I explain?

I laughed when they said our time was running out-
I stirred the leaves in the tea I'd brewed to drain.

Break your pride, be the Consoler for once-
Bring roses, let my love illusion remain.

An era's passed since the luxury of tears-
Make me weep, Consoler, let blood know its rain.

From New York to Andalusia I searched for you-
Lorca, dazzled on your lips, is all of Spain.

"Time, like Love, wears a mask in this story."
And Love? My blind spot. Piercing me to the brain.

Oh, that my head were waters, mine eyes a fountain
So that I may weep day and night for the slain.

Shouting your name till last car had disappeared,
how I ran on the platform after your train.

To find her, 'round phantom-wrists I glue bangles-
What worlds she did not break when she left my lane!

Still beguiled with hopes of you, the heart is lit.
To put out this last candle, come, it burns in vain.


D. H. Lawrence (http://www.cswnet.com/~erin/dhlpoem.htm)

No! Mr. Lawrence!

No, Mr Lawrence, it's not like that!
I don't mnd telling you
I know a thing or two about love,
perhaps more than you do.

And what I know is that you make it
too nice, too beautiful.
It's not like that, you know; you fake it.
It's really rather dull.


All I ask

All I ask of a woman is that she shall feel gently towards
me
when my heart feels kindly towards her,
and there shall be the soft, soft tremor as of unheard bells
between us.
It is all I ask.
I am so tired of violent women lashing out and insisting
on being loved, when there is no love in them.

Pablo Neruda http://www.poemhunter.com/pablo-neruda/poet-6638/


Sonnet XVII

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.


Don't go far off... by Pablo Neruda

Don't go far off, not even for a day, because --
because -- I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?

http://www.public.asu.edu/~nielle/neruda.htm

Luminous till drowning

I was I was
What a dreamer I was
Below the banyan tree
chasing your plaits I was
Across the noisy brook
chanting your name I was
Engrossed in your thoughts
pinining without a pause
Floating diya of faith
luminous till drowning I was. 10

I was I was
How enchanted I was
Inventing on your bodyscape
Kashmir Manali I was
In verses of Kalidasa Neruda
the poet in love I was
Determined to make you mine
striving without a pause
Floating diya of faith
luminous till drowning I was. 20

I was I was
Why a fool I was
Ignored my receding hairline
in wait a decade I was
Gobbled envy with vodka lime
Devdas sans Chandramukhi I was
Oblivious to your deceit
Mirza without a pause
Floating diya of faith
luminous till drowning I was. 30

May 03, 2006
1:30 pm

FOOTNOTES:

line 9: diya is an earthen lamp, with cotton wick that burns in oil.
line 10: diya is released into river on some holy nights in India, and floats away with a beautiful, flickering flame till it vanishes off your sight.
line 14: Kashmir and Manali are two valleys in Himalayas. A sixteen century poet remarked about Kashmir, "If there is heaven on earth, it is here, it is here, it is here."
line 15: Kalidasa was a great Sanskrit poet and writer, whose quality and quantity of brilliant works is matched maybe only by Shakespeare.
line 26: Devdas loved Paro, but wasn't able to stand against his father's whim and couldn't marry her. He, then, drank himself to death, while dancer Chandramukhi took him in and nursed him with her own unrequited love. A Sarat Chandra classic written in Bengali, made into two well known Bollywood movies.
line 28: Sahiba Mirza is a folk love story from Punjab. When Mirza eloped with Sahiba, he stopped on the way to take a nap. They were being pursued by Sahiba's five brothers. While Mirza slept, Sahiba's love for her brothers prompted her to break all Mirza's arrows, and hence when he was attacked, he was unarmed and heartbroken, and died fighting. Overcome by grief, Sahiba killed herself.

Immortal Mirza Ghalib Part I

In Urdu Poetry, Mirza Ghalib is the God himself.
Some of my favorites (excellent compilation exists on http://www.cs.wisc.edu/~navin/india/songs/ghalibindex.html and I am copying a few of my favorites here)

1. dil-e-naadaaN tujhe huaa kya hai ?
aaKHir is dard kee dawa kya hai

2. ham haiN mushtaaq aur woh bezaar
ya ilaahee ! yeh maajra kya hai ?

[ mushtaaq = interested, bezaar = displeased/sick of ]

3. maiN bhee muNh meiN zabaan rakhta hooN
kaash ! poocho ki "muddaa kya hai" ?

hamko unse wafa ki hai ummeed
jo naheeN jaante wafa kya hai

maiNe maana ki kuchch naheeN 'GHalib'
muft haath aaye to bura kya hai ?

aah ko chaahiye ik 'umr asar hone tak
kaun jeeta hai teree zulf ke sar hone tak ?

2. daam har mauj meiN hai halqa-e-sad_kaam-e-nahaNg
dekhaiN kya guzre hai qatre pe guhar hone tak

[ daam = net/trap, mauj = wave, halqa = ring/circle, sad = hundred,
nahaNg = crocadile, sad_kaam-e-nahaNg = crocadile with a hundred
jaws, guhar = pearl ]

3. aashiqee sabr talab aur tamanna betaab
dil ka kya rang karooN KHoon-e-jigar hone tak ?

[ sabr = patience, talab = search ]

4. ham ne maana ke taGHaful na karoge, lekin
KHaak ho jaayeNge ham tumko KHabar hone tak

[ taGHaful = neglect/ignore ]

baazeechaa-e-atfaal hai duniya mere aage
hota hai shab-o-roz tamaasha mere aage

[ baazeechaa = play/sport, atfaal = children ]

aashiq hooN, pe maashooq_farebee hai mera kaam
majnooN ko bura kehti hai laila mere aage

[ farebee = a fraud/cheat ]

teree wafa se kya ho talaafee, ki dahar meiN
tere siwa bhee ham pe bahut se sitam huve

[ talaafee = compensation, dahar = world, sitam = opression ]

bus ki dushwaar hai har kaam ka aasaaN hona
aadmee ko bhee muyassar naheeN insaaN hona

[ dushwaar = difficult, muyassar = possible ]

2. giriya chaahe hai KHaraabee mere kaashaane ki
dar-o-deevaar se Tapke hai bayaabaaN hona

[ giriyaaN = weeping, kaashaana = house, bayaabaaN = wilderness ]

3. waa-e-deewaangee-e-shauq, ke har dam mujhko
aap jaana udhar aur aap hee hairaaN hona

kee mere qatl ke baad usne jafa se tauba
haay us zood_pashemaaN ka pashemaaN hona

[ jafa = oppression, zood = quickly, pashemaaN = ashamed/
embarrassed ]

9. haif us chaar girah kapDe ki qismat 'GHalib'
jis ki qismat meiN ho aashiq ka girebaaN hona

[ haif = alas!, girah = one sixteenth of a yard, girebaaN = collar ]

kitne sheereeN haiN tere lab ! ki raqeeb
gaaliyaaN khaake be_maza na huaa

[ sheereeN = sweet ]

5. hai KHabar garm unke aane kee
aaj hee ghar meiN boriya na huaa !

[ boriya = mat, here it refers to groceries ]

6. kya woh namrood kee KHudaaee thee
bandagee meiN tera bhala na huaa

[ namrood = an old king who used to say that he was god ]

7. jaan dee, dee huee usee ki thee
haq to ye hai ke haq adaa na huaa

dil hee to hai na sang-o-KHisht dard se bhar na aaye kyoN ?
royeNge ham hazaar baar, koee hameiN sataaye kyoN ?

[ sang = stone, KHisht = brick ]

2. dair naheeN, haram naheeN, dar naheeN, aastaaN naheeN
baiTHe haiN rehguzar pe ham, GHair hameiN uTHaaye kyoN ?

[ dair = temple, haram = mosque, dar = gate, aastaaN = abode,
rehguzar = path/way ]

3. jab woh jamaal-e-dil_faroz, soorat-e-meher-e-neem_roz
aap hee ho nazzaara_soz, parde meiN muNh chupaaye kyoN ?

[ jamaal = beauty, faroz = shining/luminous, meher = sun,
neem_roz = mid day, nazzaara_soz = beautiful/worth seeing ]

dil se teree nigaah jigar tak utar gayee
donoN ko ik adaa meiN razaamand kar gayee

2. shaq ho gaya hai seena, KHushee lazzat-e-firaaq
takleef-e-pardaadaari-e-zaKHm-e-jigar gayee

[ shaq = crack/split, firaaq = separation,
pardaadaaree = to hide, esp. fault ]

3. woh baada-e-shabaana kee sar mastiyaaN kahaaN ?
uThiye bas ab ki lazzat-e-KHwaab-e-sahar gayee

[ baada = wine, shabaana = night, sahar = morning ]

yeh zid, ki aaj na aave aur aaye bin na rahe
qaza se shikwa hamaiN kis qadar hai kya kahiye ?

[ qaza = fate/destiny, shikwa = complaint ]

zah-e-karishma ki yoN de rakhaa hai hamko fareb
ki bin kahe hee unhaiN sab KHabar hai, kya kahiye ?

[ zah = child, karishma = wonder/miracle, fareb = deception ]

5. samajh ke karte haiN baazaar meiN woh pursish-e-haal
ki yeh kahe ki sar-e-rehguzar hai, kya kahiye ?

[ pursish = enquiry, sar-e-rehguzar = on the road ]

6. tumhaiN naheeN hai sar-e-rishtaa-e-wafa ka KHayaal
hamaare haath meiN kuchch hai, magar hai kya, kahiye ?

7. unhaiN sawaal pe zoam-e-junooN hai, kyoN laDiye ?
hame jawaab se qata'a-e-nazar hai, kya kahiye ?

[ zoam = pride, junooN = madness/frenzy,
qata'a = break/intercept, qata'a-e-nazar = to ignore ]

8. hasad sazaa-e-kamaal-e-suKHan hai, kya keeje
sitam, bahaa-e-mata'a-e-hunar hai, kya kahiye ?

[ hasad = envy/malice, sitam = oppression, bahaa = value/price,
mata'a = valuables ]

9. kaha hai kisne ki 'GHalib' buraa naheeN lekin
siwaay iske ki aashuftaa_sar hai kya kahiye ?

[ aashuftaa_sar = mentally deranged ]

ho raha hai jahaan meiN andher
zulf kee fir sarishta_daaree hai

[ sarishta_daaree = a regulator's position ]

11. fir kiya paara-e-jigar ne sawaal
ek fariyaad-o-aah-o-zaaree hai

[ paara = fragment ]

12. fir hue haiN gawaah-e-ishq talab
ashq_baaree ka hukm_zaaree hai

[ talab = search/desire/request, ashq_baaree = lamentation ]

GHair leiN mehfil meiN bose jaam ke
ham rahaiN yooN tishna_lab paiGHaam ke

[ bosa = kiss, tishna = thirsty ]

2. KHastagee ka tumse kya shikwa ki ye
hathkanDe haiN charKH-e-neelee_faam ke

[ KHastagee = injury/sickness, shikawa = complaint,
hathkanDe = tactics, charKH = sky, neelee_faam = blue colour/
complexion ]

3. KHat likhenge garche matlab kuchch na ho
ham to aashiq haiN tumhaare naam ke

. raat pee zamzam pe mai aur subh_dam
dhoye dhab'be jaam-e-'eharaam ke

[ zamzam = a well in Kaba whose water is considered holy,
mai = wine, subh_dam = at dawn, 'eharaam = dress for 'haj' ]

5. dil ko aaNkhoN ne fasaaya kya magar
ye bhee halqe haiN tumhaare daam ke

[ halqa = ring/circle, daam = net/trap ]

6. shaah ke haiN GHusl-e-sehat ko KHabar
dekhiye kab din fireiN hammaam ke

[ GHusl = bath, sehat = health, hammaam = a hot bath where a masseur
gives massage and bath ]

7. ishq ne 'GHalib' nikamma kar diya
warna ham bhee aadmee the; kaam ke

yaarab ! wo na samjhe haiN na samjheNge meree baat
de aur dil unko, jo na de mujhko zubaaN aur

3. abroo se hai kya us nigah-e-naaz ko paiwand
hai teer muqarrar magar uskee hai kamaaN aur

[ abroo = eyebrow, paiband = patch ]

4. tum shahar meiN ho to hameiN kya GHam ? jab uTHeNge
le aayenge baazaar se jaakar dil-o-jaaN aur

har ek baat pe kehte ho tum ke 'too kya hai' ?
tumheeN kaho ke yeh andaaz-e-guftgoo kya hai ?

[ guftgoo = conversation ]

2. na shole meiN yeh karishma na barq meiN yeh ada
koee batao ki woh shoKH-e-tund_KHoo kya hai ?

[ barq = lightning, tund = sharp/angry, KHoo = behavior ]

3. yeh rashk hai ki wo hota hai ham_suKHan tumse
wagarna KHauf-e-bad_aamozi-e-adoo kya hai ?

[ rashk = jealousy, ham_suKHan = to speak together/to agree,
KHauf = fear, bad = bad/wicked, aamozee = education/teaching,
adoo = enemy ]

4. chipak raha hai badan par lahoo se pairaahan
hamaaree jeb ko ab haajat-e-rafoo kya hai ?

[ pairaahan = shirt/robe/cloth, haajat = need/necessity,
rafoo = mending/darning ]

5. jalaa hai jicm jahaaN dil bhee jal gaya hoga
kuredate ho jo ab raakh, justjoo kya hai ?

[ justjoo = desire ]

6. ragoN meiN dauDte firne ke ham naheeN qaayal
jab aaNkh hee se na Tapka to fir lahoo kya hai ?

7. woh cheez jiske liye hamko ho bahisht azeez
siwaay baada-e-gul_faam-e-mushkaboo kya hai ?

[ bahisht (or bihisht, both are correct) = heaven, baada = wine,
gul_faam = delicate and fragrant like flowers, mushkaboo = like
the smell of musk ]

8. piyooN sharaab agar KHum bhee dekh looN do chaar
yeh sheesha-o-qadah-o-kooza-o-suboo kya hai ?

[ KHum = wine barrel, qadah = goblet, kooza/suboo = wine pitcher ]

9. rahee na taaqat-e-guftaar, aur agar ho bhee
to kis ummeed pe kahiye ke aarzoo kya hai ?

[ guftaar = speech/discourse ]

10. bana hai shaah ka musaahib, fire hai itaraata
wagarna shehar meiN 'GHalib' kee aabroo kya hai ?

[ musaahib = comrade/associate ]

hazaaroN KHwahishaiN 'eisee ke har KHwahish pe dam nikle
bohot nikle mere armaaN lekin fir bhee kam nikle

2. Dare kyooN mera qaatil kya rahega uskee gardan par
wo KHooN, jo chashm-e-tar se 'umr bhar yooN dam_ba_dam nikle

[ KHooN = blood, chashm = eye, tar = wet, dam_ba_dam = continously ]

3. nikalna KHuld se aadam ka sunte aayaiN haiN lekin
bohot be_aabru hokar tere kooche se ham nikle

[ KHuld = heaven, be_aabaru = disgrace, koocha = street ]

4. bharam khul jaaye zaalim tere qaamat ki daraazee ka
agar is turra-e-pur_pech-o-KHam ka pech-o-KHam nikle

[ daraazee = length/delay, qaamat = stature, turra = an ornamental
tassel worn in the turban, pech-o-KHam = curls in the
hair/complexity ]

5. magar likhwaaye koee usko KHat, to hamse likhawaaye
huee subah aur ghar se kaan par rakhkar qalam nikle

6. huee is daur meiN mansoob mujhse baada_aashaamee
fir aaya wo zamaana, jo jahaaN se jaam-e-jam nikle

[ mansoob = association, baada_aashaamee = association with
drinking ]

7. huee jinse tavaqqo KHastagee kee daad paane kee
wo hamse bhee ziyaada KHasta-e-teGH-e-sitam nikle

[ tavaqqo = expectation, KHastagee = weakness, daad = justice,
KHasta = broken/sick/injured, teGH = sword, sitam = cruelity ]

8. mohabbat meiN naheeN hai farq jeene aur marne kaa
usee ko dekh kar jeete haiN jis kaafir pe dam nikle

9. zara kar jor seene par ki teer-e-pursitam nikle
jo wo nikle to dil nikle, jo dil nikle to dam nikle

10. KHuda ke waaste parda na kaabe se uThaa zaalim
kaheeN 'eisa na ho yaaN bhee wohee kaafir sanam nikle

11. kahaaN maiKHaane ka darwaaza 'GHalib' aur kahaaN waaiz
par itana jaante haiN kal wo jaata tha ke ham nikle

[ waaiz = preacher/advisor ]

Review: Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham

Honest, heartfelt masterpiece

W. Somerset Maugham's Of Human Bondage is one of the best novels I have ever read. The language is simple. The narration is subtle. The characters are real and display emotions and feelings everyone can identify with. The power of novel becomes apparent when you are reading it. You choke up every once a while, you smile for hours after you have finished reading certain passages, and you comprehend your own self, your woes and possibilities, better through perspectives that novel provides.

Philip Carey is born with a clubfoot, and as he grows up, orphaned, he struggles with his own deformity. The initial quarter of the novel is about his growing up, and details incidents and relationships that shape our hero. He then develops a fancy of becoming a painter and travels to Paris, only to quit few years later to return to London, where he studies to become a doctor. The most engrossing part of novel starts here with the entry of Mildred, the waitress.

The rest of the novel thrives on the passion of Philip, his love that carries him to the edge of self-destruction, and his coming of age. Unrequited love has never been potrayed better. Philip allows himself to become an instrument in hands of cold-hearted Mildred, who repeatedly ruins herself through absurd choices, and ruins him for not withstanding his love and care, he finds himself snubbed, ridiculed, bereft. Eventhough his reason tells him otherwise, Philip is unable to release himself from his passion for a considerable time. As is said in the novel, "But when all was said the important thing was to love rather than to be loved; and he yearned for Mildred with his whole soul."

The novel is lot more than just story of Philip and Mildred, and there are other unforgettable characters. Each person Philip encounters and each friend he makes, leaves an indelible impression on him and the reader. Be it his idealist friend Hayward, who has too much promise too little product, the poet Cronshaw who dies in poverty, Fenny Price whose hard work cannot make her draw even reasonably well, his uncle and aunt whose love is both tacit and beautifully potrayed and the writer Norah who shows Philip of a caring and loving other.

The most charming people in the novel are Athlneys. Athlney brings life and humor into the novel, and I think saves Philip from a total destruction. The novel really highlights the virtue that lies in a simple, happy married life and Anthlneys win over both Philip and readers with their goodness and simplicity. Thorpe Anthlney with his nine children is a jolly character, and be it his conversations or actions, he wins over our hearts outright.

Philip finds love in most unexpected quarters and is surprised by how help crops up from strangers. His every experience makes him as richer as the reader becomes in reading about it. The thoughts about the meaning of life, or about love or religion or about virtue or vice, and about each aspect of life that Philip encounters are spelt out with a subtlety and mastery. These thoughts find easy resonance with the reader, and make Of Human Bondage an unforgettable affair. The honesty of this piece is stunning. This novel, written without any flourishes and intricate wordplay or mystery, is I think a celebration of the deep insight and understanding of the author.

I have read his other works. The Razor's Edge, The Moon and Six Pence as well as his short stories are a proof of Maugham's ability to tell simple tales with great mastery. These, on their own, make Maugham a great novelist. But it is after reading Of Human Bondage that I realized why most novelists and readers have considered this piece as one the greatest pieces in World Literature. Maugham's aim was perhaps of catharisis and he put his own emotions into the characters, and therefore, he's created a work that is timeless and unforgettable. A must read for everyone who can read.

Meritocracy, neo-casteism, perspiration in Reservation

I am trying to articulate arguments in response to various blogs and comments that have been posted on reservation issue and I will continue to pitch in till the Voice of the Meritorious is heard and understood.

Its remarked that selection of the best in entrance examination is a flawed system, for the "best" is relative, "crammers" select themselves, "richer" people who have access to better facilities and education hold the cards of advantage and the "highest" scorers are not necessarily the best engineers or doctors or businessmen or administrators. This argument, I believe, must be the very argument against reservation as well, for among them too, it is these "richer, cramming bests" who enter the colleges.

We must however never forget that brilliance is not the only criterion for selection in these exams, crude cramming gets you nowhere, "rich" parents can provide better preparation, but outcome is a result of PERSPIRATION, a hard work spread over months, a determination that helps you to do your best and this personal best needs to be GOOD ENOUGH to get you somewhere.

Reservation is my idea of NEO-CASTEISM. Divide and rule. The hypnotic mantra of equality can been beaten to death by communists and socialists. It does not matter if human beings are born with equal physical and mental capabilities, for four thousand years of humanity has seen that it requires perspiration, inspiration, talent, capability and training to become anything better than average. I will not expect people to rise to same level even if they have same facilities available to them. If you don't trust my argument, look at any family and you will see how different the children turn out to be. Mere facilities ensure nothing.

As someone remarked, IITs have a minimal cut-off and there is no reservation for people when they take internal examinations. Brilliant argument. So lets locate statistics and see how these students have fared over last fifty years, for they were "smart" enough to graduate from class. Do the same for people in every medical, engineering and other college, for some people harp on how reservation is just required to get these sections through the door. Do quota people ever do as well as their other counterparts? Those who do, the select few, would do so well without the need of quota. The majority fares badly. Go check the statistics. But it does not matter, for reservation allows these guys to get jobs more easily again. The quality is compromised at admission stage at first, then again at the hiring stage, and then again during the time of promotion. If education can rescue the SC/ST/OBC from their lack of opportunity, reservation at every subsequent stage is redundant. Isn't it? A doctor who gets in by virtue of caste, graduate by virtue of caste, and in spite of taking extra years to graduate, and having the worst scores in class can become a good doctor in the end, but pray if that is so, why must the others from more "priviliged" classes be not given the same "equal" opportunity. Isn't this neo-casteism?

The argument about what the so called cream of the nation has offered to the country is a just argument, and in stead of my harping on how many billions of dollars and how many jobs have been created by this cream, I will ask the skeptics to check it themselves. Also I will ask them to make a caste wise comparison to understand how valuable reservation has been.

I firmly believe the most meritorious will beat the odds irrespective of how many seats they are supposed to fight for. But I also think that lesser number of seats will produce lesser number of competitive people. In the world of competition, of free market, in the global village we can rise through education that provides skill and capability, and those who cannot walk without the crutches of reservation will only hamper the country's progress.

I simply cannot comprehend how many generations are needed before the reservations can be removed. For in last fifty years, some families have benefitted from reservations for atleast two to three generations, and mind you, they form the "cream" in the reservation class, for they select themselves.

Those who talk about how poor the people from some of the reserved classes are, need to understand that poverty cannot be uprooted through reservation in professional degrees and jobs, but by creation of better opportunities as well as the capacity in these people to make most of these opportunities.

Most have argued here that families must not be allowed to benefit from reservation in more than one generation. I think if there has to be reservation, my logic of selecting best prepared candidates demands that if the second generation people are better, I'd much rather have them occupy those seats than undercooked candidates. But of course, this logic defeats the whole argument about using reservation for improving socio-economic condition of several classes, and by virtue of this seemingly convulated argument, I wish to suggest that NO RESERVATIONS is only end to this conundrum.

A word about meritocracy: merit is subjective, true, but thanks to system of merit, millions like me are able to get the returns, the value we deserve for having worked much harder than my other classmates. There are too many smart and intelligent people in India, there are too many hard working people too, there are rich and poor people, but the ingredient that tied me to my other classmates was I knew that we all have had toiled our way through, and we all had some level of intellect. This training and confidence is the reason why students selected through hardest competitions command respect in all spheres of life, get fat pay checks and have a deserved good life. It did not matter how rich or poor their parent were, we got through for we knew things at that age that required something greater than talent or intellect or facilities can ensure. It required mixed blessing of perspiration, inspiration, intellect and dedication. It is these values we need to enshrine in everyone to become better.

Equality of opportunity is the ideal we need to achieve.
Other equalities are intrinisically impossible due to human nature.

Let it be a level playing field. Like animal kingdom, let it be survival of the fittest.

Review of Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

Shockingly mesmerizing love story?


Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov flirts with perversity, flaunts literary devices tastefully, evokes admiration and disgust in equal measure, and remains to be an extremely powerful potrayal of human emotion. Much has been said about underlying political metaphor in having Humbert as the european intellectual drifter "romancing" Lolita, his foster American child, and about the morality of the whole saga. With or without refering to these metaphors, the writing retains its charm for the engrossing word play.

There are no graphic details of sexual acts, and this is no easy read for those who consider pornography as literary composition. This is not a two cent sex thriller as sometimes the colloquial references make it seem. This is not about escapades of an old man travelling around the United States with a young nymphet. This is not even like Lady Chatterley's Lover, which sizzles with the passion of its protagonists. Lolita is about that love, that fire which consumes everyone that comes in contact with it. This is a feverish tale of a seemingly perverted Humbert sinking deeper and deeper into his fascination with nymphets.

The novel is rich in wit and satire, many descriptions of nature or Humbert's thoughts and feelings are sheer poetry, and the narration is both fascinating and intriguing. Intriguing in capturing an array of ideas and acts that are not only difficult to put on paper, but as history testifies, immediately make the author target of ridicule and condemnation. Like most others, I started reading the book with some prejudices and some precepts. Little did I know that my flight in a plane would show me the outer space: such is the power of the book.

Yes, the book lives at the very edge. Nabokov romances with the baseline. Small errors could have meant the ball landed out of the court, and the game wouldn't be as exciting as it is now. There is a suspense that thrives on our knowledge of HH's ideas and motives, and our knowledge that none of the other characters share the information the reader has. There is a sadness that is undercurrent of most love stories. There is a sense of disgust, for the whole idea of a twelve year old being ploughed by an old man is sickening to people of our generation and our education. Like Nabokov points out, till fifty years ago, a girl would start procreating as soon as she hit the teenage. There is an awe imposed on the reader by the way this taut story proceeds, the choice of sentences, dialogue, words reflects why Nabokov's Lolita occupies such a prominent place in the world literature.

Pray do read it. Read it piecemeal. It is a difficult but fascinating read. Recommended highly for everyone. It does not matter how you perceive Humbert or Lolita or anyone in the novel; you could run into similar characters on the street. Make allowances for HH's obsession, Lolita's nature, and then you will see Lolita is like a lotus blooming in the mud of passion and perversity. To pick this flower, you need to wade though the mud, and I believe it will be worth the effort. Reading this novel, like the story it tells, is full of torment. It will test and tease your own thoughts about morality, sexuality, sensuality and love. Like every great book, you will be forced into understanding your own self, as well as everyone around you better. Shocking, but mesmerizing tale. Must read.

Communism, Reservation, Justice, Upliftment

In my previous blog, I suggested the voice of the meritorious must rise, specifically addressing why it is important to use merit as sole criterion for selection in IIT, IIM, private sector, medicine and elsewhere. There were few interesting responses and a number of other blogs and comments speaking about the same issue. I will try to summarize how and why I think the ideal of social justice cannot be used as an excuse for reservation, and how such political choices are motivated by communist, pro-mediocre mentalities.

An economic upliftment argument is always cited as prime reason for continuing reservation. How can one define economic upliftment, and how many series of reserved position does a person require to really have his share of social justice? A simple example: The caste allows the kid to get free education, followed by "easier" access to a position in medical or engineering college based on the quota. Now that person has all the requisite qualification, he is after all a graduate, he should be capable enough of earning a living. But no, it seems he is not. Then he will get the job through the quota, say he becomes a doctor or engineer or enters the State Civil Services. His "unreserved" classmate, who comes from a caste that was "priviliged" for hundreds of years, must work much harder at each stage to get the same appointment. Now both "should" have gained some equality, for they start with same education and have got the same job. But alas no! The reserved category allows the person to rise faster and higher. The capability, the work ethic, the economic condition of both employees has no bearing on promotion: the qouta person always holds an advantage. Now that he is able to earn better and rise higher, his son is atleast as "priviliged" in terms of economic condition and education as son of his counterpart, YET HIS SON FINDS THE SAME HIERARCHY OF BENEFITS waiting for him.

Someone pointed out that I have no statistics to support my claim that IITs have a large share of students like me who come from middle class and whose parents had to struggle to get us through the education regime. Perhaps one can check that. I do remember that most people of "quota" that I knew in IIT were sons of high ranking officials, and most of them relied on "reservation" to get them their next appointment, so IIT degree, that was "subsidized" to a greater degree for them, did not cause them to became quite as capable as aimed. So is true for all IAS officers selected through quota.

There is no denying that many people coming out of the quotas are absolutely brilliant, and if they are brilliant the reservation is redundant. Not all who DON'T get selected in entrance examination are less inteliigent or less worthy than who get through, many factors control that. But those who get through have a bare minimum intelligence, have put in the requisite effort (for luck loves effort), share some capabilities: we ought to respect that. A smart student will make his way, irrespective of whether he clears a particular exam after tenth or not. An Ambani or Anil Aggarwal will become a billionare, without any clutches to prop him. Even higher education is "not that important".

The whole hue and cry about "how we are unaware of village conditions" is more celebrated by my city friends. I grew up in small towns and spent a fair amount of times in villages. I have worked in slums too. For extremely poor, reservation is of less value than food and education. For middle class, reservation is important for it affects not simply their employment opportunities, but each stage of their career. For rich, there are infinite routes to employment and more money.

We have fallen into a communist mindset, where we believe all need to earn equally well, all need equal amount of luxuries and all deserve same quality of life. Everyone is not Tendulkar to be inducted into the list of cricketing legends. Everyone cannot run as fast as PT Usha. You can teach someone to read and write, but you cannot make him into Tagore or Premchand. Being Dhyan Chand requires both talent and effort, and no matter how you justify induction of a player into hockey team based on his economic status or caste, he is a bad choice if he is not the best. In government service or bureaucracy mediocricity is celebrated (one may exclude many extremely smart and motivated people, but I am talking about the majority who are not perhaps the best hires). A mediocre officer requires the political support to stay in good books, is prone to corruption and waits for his time for every promotion. A good officer bites his lip, is bitter about his having to work hard, lives poorly for he cannot accept bribes like others and dies after years of hard work. Of course, reservation for many of these jobs may not alter the quality of work that is expected from the employee. In competitive environment, one needs more than just knowledge, one needs motivation that tell him that his best effort will be rewarded and recognized.

A smart student or employee does not require a last name or family name for every admission and promotion at each level of his career.

Is the son of a Member of Parliament or an IAS officer or a big businessman or a rich farmer "under priviliged"?

I don't buy the argument about "discriminated for years, hence need reservation either." I do not consider myself responsible for the historical misgivings. Mughals mistreated Sikhs and Hindus in north does not mean I avenge that. The British and European discriminated against us (and Asians and Africans) for centuries does not mean they open their country to us and give us a quota in jobs or education there.
ONE WRONG CANNOT BE UNDONE BY ANOTHER WRONG.
ONE INJUSTICE IS NOT A JUSTIFICATION FOR ANOTHER INJUSTICE.

We have to compete with China, where decisions are taken promptly and even their communism does not require "reservation policy". We need to compete with US that attracts the most motivated workforce from everywhere. We need to compete with Japan and France that certainly rely on use of best workforce available.

I agree our education system and selection system have their own flaws. I agree much needs to be done to alter the social and economic status of most people belonging to poorer classes. I agree the effort needs to be active. I agree that if one person gets a good job, he inspires his whole family to rise. I agree that upliftment is necessary. I agree with these ends, NOT THE MEANS.

JUSTICE MUST MEAN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY. By some effort, one can strive to provide equal "capability", allow special coaching for poorer people appearing for entrance examinations or for job interviews. Once each is trained and provided for in preparation time, MERITORIOUS WILL SELECT THEMSELVES. There is no lack of opportunity for EDUCATED AND RICH, then why do we need reservation for them who already have GRADUATE AND POST GRADUATE DEGREES? Once you have obtained a job, you have gone through the door, you earn quite well, why do you need reservation at every subsequent step as well? Why does your son and grandson require quota seats, if you have benefitted from it for thirty years of your own career?

You cannot make everyone rich by distributing money to the poor. Unless you teach a man how to best use his funds, he will squander them. Unless he is forced to earn something through his own labor, a provided for beggar would love being a beggar. It requires less labor, and if you call his profession a dignified way of existance, he will have no motivation to strive for changing his status. ACCESS TO OPPORTUNITY AND CAPABILITY IS MORE IMPORTANT (and surely more dignified) THAN PROVIDING A "RESERVED JOB." Quality, my friends, is paramount. If my life is in danger, I will want treatment from the best qualified doctor, and my sense of social justice demands that the best is selected. If I am going to spend a billion dollars on research, my sense of social justice demands the smartest, irrespective of how rich or poor his father was, makes use of my money.
CREATE OPPORTUNITIES, INCREASE CAPABILITY
BUT PRAY PLEASE NEVER COMPROMISE ON QUALITY.